Sunday, January 28, 2007
Silent
"He who restrains his words has knowledge,
And he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding.
Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise;
When he closes his lips, he is counted prudent."
Prov 17:27-28
As such i choose to remain silent...
words of anger and hurt always caused more strife...
and when sprouted out...it's usually too late for regret...
With you @10:44 PM
Sunday, January 21, 2007
To the One above
My belief shaken...
My faith doubted...
Have i believed in the wrong things...?
Have i gone the wrong way...?
But other than believing...
There's nothing else i can do...
Other than holding on...
There's no other way out...
I have a life...
Is my life destined...?
Have i incurred Your wrath...?
That i have to suffer for my misgivings...
Why...?
Why can't i just give it all up...
And start my life afresh...?
Perhaps You are right afterall...
Worldly desires are temporary...
Who can love me more than You...
Yet i refuse to return to Your arms...
The fear in me is just so great...
I know i have to stand before You one day...
But i'm afraid...
Afraid to give up what i have now...
I do not know what i seek...
I do not know what i want...
I feel betrayed...
I guess that's how You felt when i left...
I dare not return to You now...
For i'm not ready...
And i fear i will leave again someday...
and break Your heart once again...
I dare not ask for more...
For i do not deserve to...
I can't say how sorry i am...
I really am...
Please forgive me...
With you @12:01 AM
Friday, January 12, 2007
Treasure and Respect
My good friend says...
people tend not to treasure things that are readily available...
people tend to take available things for granted...
My good friend says...
people tend to lose respect for people who don't have self respect...
people tend to look down on people without self pride...
I wonder...
if he takes me for granted...?
as i have made myself readily available...
I wonder...
if he still respect me...?
as i have tore down my pride and lower myself...
I wonder...
if i have crossed the line...?
With you @4:59 PM
Thursday, January 11, 2007
My Love
I love you for bringing joy to my life...
I love you for not giving up on me...
I love you for loving me...
I love you when we party...
the way you look at me...
the way you hold me close to you...
I love you when you cook for me...
the simple fried rice and egg...
the spaghetti and bacon...
so yummy and heart filling...
I love you when you play badminton with me...
all the funny stunts...
and the laughters that come with it...
I love you when you gave me the gifts..
my first birthday present...
the necklace in the little blue box...
I love you for knowing me...
knowing my thoughts...
knowing what i want to say even before the words are out of my mouth...
I love you for all the hugs and kisses...
the little romance...
so personal and close...
I love you when you call me from abroad...
the smses that you sent...
indicating that you misses me...
I love you for tolerating me....
for giving way to my unreasonable behaviours...
for being so patient with me...
I love you for travelling with me...
for sharing the same passion...
visiting the places of my dreams...
I love you when you sleep...
for putting your arms around me...
for nuzzling against me...
I love you when we wash the car together...
our very own car...
the car you said will always belong to us...
I love you when we wanted to get the same christmas gift for each other...
without planning and saying...
we wanted to get the same thing...
I love you when you invited me to your cousin's place for dinner...
for holding my hand at the corridoor...
for making me part of your life...
I love you when you share your thoughts with me..
the debate we have over topics...
the chat on almost everything...
I love you for bringing my baby to swimming...
for the clothes you bought for him...
for driving him around...
I love you when you try to make me happy...
the assurance you try to give me...
the efforts you put in not to hurt me...
I love you when you describe your future home...
the way you say how 'OUR' house will look like...
the kind of furniture and decor that you like...
I love you when we chill out...
the ride up mount faber...
and the walk along fishermen village...
I love you when we go shopping...
choosing adidas shirts that you like...
holding my hand through the crowd...
I love you for sending me to work...
waking up early in the morning...
scarificing the little previous sleep that you have...
I love you when you talk about your trips...
how you wish i was there with you...
and how i wish i can be there too...
I love you when we wore the same shirt to the party...
so attached...
so close...
I love you for all the little things you have done for me...
I love you for making me part of your life...
I love you for who you are...
I love you for loving me...
With you @2:45 PM
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
Silence
Silence...
so tranquil, so peaceful...
Silence...
so lonesome, so frightful...
Silence...
How long can one remain silent...?
How long can one watch in silence...?
Silence...
fills my world...
Silence...
Breaks my soul...
Silence...
Should i remain silent...?
Should i watch in silence...?
Silence...
In it's peace i dwell...
Silence...
In it's doubt i live...
Silence...
Can i remain silent...?
Can i watch in silence...?
Silence...
Be silent...
Stay still...
Stay calm...
Hear my heart break...
Mend my soul...
With you @11:25 AM
Monday, January 08, 2007
Life is a wonder
Life is a wonder...
you never know what's in it...
In a rollar coaster ride...
it's full of ups and downs...
but at least...
you can anticipate the ups...
and expect the downs...
Life is a wonder...
you can never anticipate the ups...
and can never expect the downs...
Life is a wonder...
Just when you thought you had it all...
something has to happen to take it all away...
and just when you thought you have nothing left...
someone comes by and fills up your life...
Life is a wonder...
there's no right...
and there's no wrong...
I guess the only way out now...
is to live by faith...
and faith is the assurance of things hoped for, and the conviction of things not seen...
(Heb 11:1)
By faith...
I'm assured that the things i hoped for will happen some day...
and I'm convinced that things that i can't see now...actually exist...
By faith i live...
and i hope you do not give up too...
Have faith...
With you @11:02 PM
Monday, January 01, 2007
The End
The bad dreams have came true...
I guess it's my fault...
The end of year 2006 has brought closure to many things...
I don't know to feel happy or to feel sad...
I just know it's too painful to end it all...
Things come and go...
I'm disappointed in myself...
The way i handled my emotions...
The way i do things...
All i can say is i've failed miserably...
Year 2007...
I just want you to be happy...
With you @5:14 PM
